about saying sorry.

ok i got this off one of those friendster bulletin posts and i thought it's pretty interesting and useful, too. :)

&& keep in mind that this does not necessarily have to apply ONLY to men cuz i feel that it works the other way round as well.

Many men believe that it is wrong to say "sorry" to a woman. There are even some dating coaches who teach men to say "too bad" instead of "sorry" to a woman whenever they make a mistake.

I disagree.

I think it's perfectly okay to say "sorry" to a woman as long as:

1) You have a real reason to say it.
2) You don't repeat it.
3) You don't ask for forgiveness.

A real man shouldn't be afraid of admitting his own mistakes. If he screws up really badly, he shouldn't be afraid to apologize to anyone. Just apologize, and let it go.

After all, part of being a man is accept responsibility for your own action.

What you DON'T want to do, however, is to keep on begging a woman for forgiveness.

A lot of men who do apologize to women make the mistake of apologizing "too much".

The human mind is very interesting. If you "keep on" saying "sorry" to a woman, she is going to get on a power trip and keep "pretending" that she's mad at you in order to hear more - until she actually BELIEVES that she's mad at you. Sometimes, they will eventually forget WHY they are mad at you, but STAY MAD at you anyway in order to keep the upper hand.

So...instead of begging for forgiveness, just say "sorry", admit you've made a mistake, and change topics. If she's really mad at you, leave her alone and let her blow up some steam. But don't ask for forgiveness. You've already apologized. Asking for forgiveness won't do you any good.

Lastly, be careful about saying "sorry" if you're one of those guys who are "always sorry". While there is no problem with saying "sorry" when you have made a big mistake, you should NOT apologize for everything you do on a date.

- ashamedly, i admit to being one of those women going on the 'power trips' mentioned in this. :(